Parked my bike on the trail and took off for a bike ride. Afterward, I headed to the car wash, when I noticed a note on the windshield. Seriously, guys? I sent my significant other a surprise birthday cake, paid for her and her family’s dinner, and sent flowers to her office. If I knew all I needed was a note asking to play with her booty, I could’ve saved some $! No one is getting near my butt with just a note. Not even my proctologist. He makes appointments, and sends several reminders!