You can always tell her straight up that no that money is for set things you will not be spending more than that, put ye foot down the only important part of the whole thing is being with one another pledging yourselfs to eachother a vow tied to the heart. It need not have to cost you all 16k to do so. A fancy party or a roof over the head one lasts longer than the other. Best to dissapoint her now over a day than to have to wait for a honeymoon and wait for a home.