I have a new granddaughter. She is exquisite! My husband was killed 11 years ago in a car accident, and I told an acquaintance, “We have 9 grandbabies now!” She looked at me and said, “WE?? How long has Dave been gone now??” I said, “11 years? 11 months? 11 days? 11 minutes? It depends on the day how raw the grief feels.” She said, “But he’s gone, YOU have 9 grandkids, not WE.” I just turned and walked away. OUR love produced 4 sons, who have given US 9 grandbabies. What does it matter to her??