1/2 True story: When we first got a car that would read your texts out loud in that robot voice while you drive, I used to text ridiculous things to my husband and pretend it was the car talking. Mostly stuff like "you should buy chocolate for your wife" One day for fun I texted him: "Hello, I am your car. I am in love with you. I need you to make love to my vagina, which I have even though I am a car" Regrettably he was on the highway at the time and I nearly caused him to get into an accident