It’s right there man. Sheesh. (Don’t ask me, I’m a bass player)

I want to count it much slower but then I quickly realize how wrong I am.

Unless you come in on 1 it's academic. If you come in on 1 you're screwed.

https://youtube.com/shorts/hYoN0Kcn9Dw?si=YF5RCuWbyiMvSZyY

So you’re the right one to answer, maybe: is it only considered a good jazz drum solo if no one can figure out where 1 is when you’re wrapping up? Because in about half the solos I hear there comes a point where the drummer seems to say to himself: “here’s where I prove how good I am by completely obscuring the beat”, and I can’t count through it no matter how much attention I’m paying…

i think it’s double time 3/4, and the beat starts on 1 and?

Depending on how you're perceiving time, it's an 8th or 16th note RIGHT before the first note. The beginning of the song begins before the bar line of the 1.

“Spirits in the Material World” by the Police. First strike is the 5. The 1 is silent. The bass drum is on the 3 and 7.

It’s on the and of and of and of and of eleventy nine.

Non-musician here, but isn’t it during that first note of the bassline/intro, RIGHT after it begins?