I’m autistic and I take care of level 3 autistics. It can Indeed make someone rude. Being kind is a Skill people have to work on and some people are so busy trying to survive they haven’t mastered the skill of being kind. It takes time and safety to learn a skill. You have to accommodate them everywhere else so they have the chance to work on the skill which is being kind.

My husband is on the spectrum and is absolutely the best human I know. He will never ever let me feel bad about myself and his character is so strong in the best way possible (morals, sillyness, interests etc) . 🥰

It depends on what you consider rude. Some people would think my son is rude because he doesn’t make eye contact. But here’s the thing, if he can listen to you or he can spend all his energy trying to make eye contact. He can’t do both and he shouldn’t have to to make someone else more comfortable. I’m much more concerned about his ability to give and take in a social conversation, but all NT people see is the lack of eye contact.

I think you’ve missed the whole point…

It can be an explanation for a particular situation, but not a justification for an entire personality. Not allowing someone to say why a disability made something difficult for them makes it harder for them to overcome it.

Rudeness is cultural and subjective. Some people are rude intentionally, regardless or neurotype. Some people may be perceived as rude or disrespectful by the social group they're interacting with because of a difference in neurotype. These are not the same, and your post conflates them.