Hello there, stranger on the internet here 👋. Life is really something right? You thought you were fine and happy but the next second you're not, been facing the same issue as you but still managed to stand back up and continue, so did you, did you not? What I'm pointing out here is you are strong, you managed to continue on with your life even though you are not okay, and maybe this will sound redundant but it's okay, life is like that, it's draining, both physically and mentally challenging.