Pfff that hits home hard. I too have a self-sabotaging inner monologue 🙄 Although for me my ADHD (I’m AuDHD) inhibits my keeping in touch skills. I’ll just won’t realize a year has gone by and then “friends” will have “moved on” And those that did stick with me I lost when my health started declining 🤷‍♂️ I sincerely hope you’ll end up finding friends/job/etc that are accommodating 😉