I would slap him upside his head, tell him I’m disappointed & disgusted because cheating is never the answer. His focus should have been on supporting & getting help for his wife not acting like a selfish twat.

Maybe your son is also depressed from a home environment that seems hopeless, joyless. His philandering may just be coping mechanism. Help them both to consult with a psychotherapist.

As his mother and as much as you love him it’s not your role to get involved in a situation that is between them as husband and wife. He needs to take this home and work through it with his wife, a counsellor, her doctor, pastoral care …. Whatever is going to resolve the issues between them. You can support from a distance without contributing with advice.

I'd tell him that his behaviour is selfish and disgusting. That I raised him better and i can't believe how disrespectful, hurtful and cruel he's being to his wife and that he's got 48 hours to tell her before I do. Actions have consequences. I have no time for badly behaved adult men. Even if I birthed them. Do better. I didn't raise you like that. It's gross. No. Patience. Left.

Be there for him to talk to . He obviously trusts you to tell you this. Advise him to see a professional counsellor either on his own or with his wife.

I would say under no circumstances do I condone cheating. That I love you but your behavior is wrong. That your wife will eventually find out so it is better coming from you. That I am not going to cut her off if she leaves you but I will not take sides.

You don’t handle it. It’s his to handle. You just tell him the truth that it’s wrong and offer suggestions like counseling or hobbies or focusing on friendships will his buddies. Every person can’t fill every role in your life.

Slap him on side of the head and tell him to grow tf up. He’s conveniently using her ills as a reason for infidelity. Does he want to cheat? Get a divorce and find out that grass ain’t greener- it’s artificial turf

Phew there is always so much nuance missing in these short posts. We’re always quick to vilify and judge without having any context. What is he’s been begging her to seek help and she refuses? What is her depression is also tied to drinking or drugs and he’s hopeless. All people cope in 1/2

Tell him he is a selfish coward and deal with his issues