Ngl, I love "bestie" New-er friends have used it with me a few times and it's possibly the *one* platonic term of endearment that doesn't make me feel massively dysphoric/ick. Bestie just feels like "we on the same side and Imma let you in on piping hot tea" vibes

I’ve a friend who calls people chicken

I am not “with it” in my 30s, but I can get the gist of what a person means by the way they say it. Babe, my love, girl, bestie, hon, sis, dude, bro, dear, miss. It all depends on who says it and how. I don’t always like being called “honey” but one person says it like it’s just part of her kindly daily repertoire and I feel fine. :-)

This might not be exactly what you’re asking, but when referring to a group I like to say “femmes and thems” (or if I know specifically I’ll go “gays and theys”).

Sweetie, honey?

I think you're overthinking it, just be yourself

Maybe just don’t be a snowflake and set yourself apart from other women just because you have the incorrect idea that you’re something other than female

I think you are over thinking it. Colloqualisms play a big factor in this type of thing so within my various friend groups different people may refer to me as chick, darling, sweetheart, honey, hun, love, gorgeous. Usually these are used when you first see someone, like the delight of seeing them is flavouring your speech with extra love. Also for sad times or big moments. I don't think I have one consistent word. I don't know if this is an Irish thing with regional accents etc.

I’m a big fan of “cutie/cuties”, personally

Not sure where you live but in the uk different places have different words to call people, where I’m from they all say love, so they’ll call a huge dude love. Where I live now it’s duck or ducky. I sometimes use flower, petal. Darling or darl maybe?