🧵 So instead, I mean-mugged him while we waited in line for the boat to take us to the restaurant (we’re at a Disney resort — which, like, if this man is screaming at his wife at the most magical place on earth in front of people, what is this dirtbag doing behind closed doors?) What SHOULD someone do in a situation like this? Nothing? Nothing feels so terrible. I wanted to at least give her an empathic look or a quick shoulder squeeze, but she was too far away and wasn’t facing us.

I wonder about this, too, and usually end up not doing anything for fear of causing more harm. One time when I decided to say something to the adult screaming at a child and holding them roughly by their wrist, he acted like he was listening respectfully and thanked me, and then dragged the child away. I called the local number for the police, but they said they couldn’t do anything. I still worry that my intervention caused far more damage

Been there. You can’t really help. He’s only doing it because she’s letting him. I got so pissed off at my husband. I started screaming back. I said fuck it. You want a war. You got a war. You can either fight back or leave. But not everyone is a fighter. I hope she makes this year the year she finally leaves him.

Watching a man choking a woman. I stop my car, reach for my phone and call the police with him watching me. Waited until police arrived. (Happened near a station)

I did an online training on the 5Ds of bystander intervention (Distract, Delegate, Document, Delay, and Direct) with this group a couple of years ago it's a skill that has to be practiced, but I'm grateful to have the framework https://righttobe.org

I remember princessing with my friends for a holiday event at a local aquarium, and there was this small family. Mom with 2-3 kids and some extended family. Mom insisted her son take a picture with us, and the boy didn't want to. She was pressuring him to the point where he started going into tears being adamant about approaching us. We were trying to awkwardly let her know (in-character) that it was alright, because now she was holding up the line. --

My husband was brutally beaten by a friend he was on a trip with, a security guard came in and dragged him out of the room. I think someone heard him calling for help in the room and it probably saved his life. I always try to help.

I too had neighbors call the police to intervene, they’d heard enough abuse from this man. I’m safe now.

I saw a man hit a woman in the face at a petrol station. She got out of the car, filled up and went to pay. I spoke to her inside and offered to drive her somewhere safe. We jumped into my little van and took off down the road. I asked if he would follow us, she produced the car keys and told me he couldn’t drive. We laughed all the way to her dad’s house. She never went back, and she now lives in my town. We always laugh when we see each other.

Given all the stories in reply to this post, my only question is what the actual fuck is wrong with men?