Starting off the New Year with more of the same shit as the last 6 years. Lost another family member to drugs. My dad this time. I will never forget the look in his eyes when I walked away from him and his choices yesterday. He hated me. Wanted to hurt me. And I think he would have hurt me a whole lot more than he did if I hadn't called the police. I'm tired. Just tired. I need a hug and I'm not going to get one. I need some peace and safety. And I'm not going to get that either. I'm tired.