So what does this mean? I actually feel like, eventhough there will be days I will stil go low and backwards, that I can do this and have for the last 1.5 years. Why am I giving my ex and parents power to keep me chained even when I’ve gone: and that hit me hard. I have to let go. Somethings I dont want to like racing mtb. But I have to. Because it feels right. Why stay? I couldn’t find a reason. Last year racing that genre I was miserable anyway so why? I can go ride anywhere and enjoy it.