3 big differences I can see for me (also a family of 4)
Our mortgage is a little over £1000pm
Our groceries are around £550pm (shopping at Sainsbury’s)
Childcare etc max £150pm
We have one main wage (husbands) and I earn around £6k pa.
We go away every other year usually and we rarely eat out/have takeaways (I’d rather go away!)