Adult Children Of Narcissistic/ toxic parents The real test of toxicity with family members is how they react when you set a boundary and refuse to back down. If they respect it, they respect & value you which almost never happens with toxic family members. If they get offended, guilt-trip you, play victim, use emotional manipulation, or even act like they’ve ‘forgotten’ your boundary to cross it covertly—it’s a clear sign of their toxicity.