I agree to some extent. What I have seen : children raised by incompetent parents become so maladapted (socially , knowledge,academic, romantically ) to the point they get ravaged badly by people growing up in more normal homes with normal parents. Incompetent parents are also horrible at giving support ,so said child becomes more independent,self reliant . And sometimes will "parent " the parents as the parents get older /more feeble from aging or disease. Dysfunctional.