Indirectness≠Tactfulness (Kindness) When we’re indirect with somone, especially when we have to communicate something uncomfortable for them or perhaps reject them, we think we’re doing it to be kind to them but really, we’re only concerned about being kind to ourselves. We don’t want to go through the discomfort of being honest. We don’t want to go through the potential discomfort of disappointing them. We don’t want to risk them being displeased or not liking us. But it isn’t kind to them.